Today, I told a friend things would never change, we wont lose touch and we will make the effort, its me and him...
Thinking back on it tonight, whilst watching oceans 12 with a cup of tea this is a lie and i know it regardless of effort.
Ive always been brought up around change, Ive moved around a lot, biggest being from Shropshire to oxford (for age 9 this was big) lived in 5 different houses, been at 6 different schools and well you get the idea, I'm pretty used to it
Every time I've been back to Shropshire though, its great, don't get me wrong but everyones moved on, there doing different things and they have changed over the months i haven't been there. one of the happy family's i knew is split up and ones in Canada, ones a brick layer, another does free running ... ive missed out the steps inbetween and there personality's have changed to go with it, its just as if I'm hanging out and having fun with strangers that i dont really know anymore, alright given real men don't use the phone for more than 3 minutes and shropshire people don't use fb/msn/own a computer as they are country bumpkins so there isnt much contact on those months which doesnt help but still
one of my fears is knowing this is most likely to happen if i get in to the army with most Oxfordshire people, basically a repeat.
ive already lost touch with some being off at uni, one inperticular i really miss talking to properly, then id be gone for 28 weeks (7 months) and if successful on this, be based in Colchester.
however this isn't whats keeping me up at the moment, from my 18th onwards im barely a shadow of who i used to be back in school
my biggest fear isnt coming back to strangers, its coming back a stranger myself, that if you gave a new name to and maybe a fancy hat, you wouldn't recognise if i passed you in the street.
Anyways i think the phase "man up" could be inserted a few times into it but still, here's some music for getting to the bottom of a post where i think about bad topics i shouldn't, this is one of many days recently ha theres a lot of topics, but its still up in the air and anything could happen, its just whats on my mind so yeah, caught this band on the reading line up and remembered i still have there songs from back in the day, here's one of them
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that was a tune, and i know real men don't talk on the phone but we do meet up in the pub so hit me up whenever you need it bro xo
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